B

Best Practices

(phr.) Your work sucks. Immediately start copying what bigger players do and produce reams of “Best Practices” manuals.

Light beer

(n.) a drink you order at a restaurant to go with a two pounds of chicken wings (see diet soda)

Bacteria

(n.) The back door of a restaurant

Babysitting

(v.) to get paid to watch TV and eat other people’s food while someone else’s kid sleeps

Beard

(n.) a food storage device found on men’s faces

Barista

(n.) A café shop worker highly skilled in writing your first name with sharpie on the side of a heat-treated paper cup

Bullshit

(n.) An eight letter word like “I love you”

Be humble

(phr.) You’re not that great

Bible

(n.) Ancient fantasy publication which talks about made-up events in the parallel universe

But

(conj.) A conjunctional point from which everything will go south

Bluejean

(n.) Clothing that’s all fun and hip until it doesn’t fit anymore

Banana

(n.) An Asian person who acts like white. Yellow on the outside, white on the inside

Bacteria

(n.) The only culture some people have

Braces

(n.) Tiny prisons for your teeth

Bully

(n.) the boy who used to take your lunch money at school yesterday in order to make Subway sandwich for you today.