F

Freudian Slip

(phr.) An expression where you say one thing but mean your mother

Fat free

(phr.) No extra charge for the fat

Futuristic

(adj.) bullshitting without consequence

Ford

(n.) The reason you buy Toyota

Fireworks Salesman

(n.) Someone who shows you innovative ways to burn money in the spirit of patriotism

True friendship

(n.) a social bond which is built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness and shenanigans

Foreign Aid

(n.) The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries

Friend

(n.) someone who knows all about you and still loves you

Family secret

(n.) The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they have a common "enemy"

Courtesy

(n.) Acceptable hypocrisy

Fox News

(n.) Retirees’ entertainment device

Fast Food Employee

(n.) Someone who makes food that is as healthy before it goes in your body as when it comes back out

Flu season

(n.) the only time of the year where you are allowed to have used paper tissues laying next to your bed