H

Husband

(n.) Someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house

Home Alone

video

Humility

(n.) The ability to act ashamed when you tell people how great you are

Hospital Bed

(n.) A parked taxi with the meter running

Husband

(n.) A person who is the boss of his house and has his wife’s permission to say so

Handkerchief

(n.) Flu Storage

Hanging

(v.) A suspended sentence

Help

video

Horticulturist

(n.) Someone who thinks that what goes down must come up

Historian

(n.) An editor of yesterday’s news

Homosexual

(n.) A man’s man

Hospital Room

(n.) A place where friends of the patient go to talk to other friends of the patient

Hunch

(n.) What you call an idea that you’re afraid is wrong

Husband

(n.) Tenured Boyfriend (also see Wife)

Houseplants

(n.) Vegetable companions