H

Handkerchief

(n.) Flu Storage

Hanging

(v.) A suspended sentence

Help

video

Horticulturist

(n.) Someone who thinks that what goes down must come up

Historian

(n.) An editor of yesterday’s news

Homosexual

(n.) A man’s man

Hospital Room

(n.) A place where friends of the patient go to talk to other friends of the patient

Hunch

(n.) What you call an idea that you’re afraid is wrong

Husband

(n.) Tenured Boyfriend (also see Wife)

Houseplants

(n.) Vegetable companions

Honesty

(n.) The fear of being caught

History

(n.) The winner's version of past events that people have decided to agree upon

Hallucination

(n.) A belief owned exclusively by one person

Hypochondriac

(n.) Someone who enjoys bad health

Hypochondriac

(n.) One who enjoys poor health, then complains of feeling better